Episode Twenty: MacGregor Chronicles

Night time was the best time. Jane could watch my family sleep when she could not. They were all so peaceful and she knew that they were well and safe. Will snored softly while Jane sat and looked at him. She knew all of his imperfections and loved each one. His six foot two inch, two hundred fifty pound frame was her comfort. She always felt small and safe in his arms. For a woman Jane had always had fairly large hands, although not disproportionate to the rest of her body, yet somewhat delicate in their own way. Even so her hands were dwarfed by his thick meaty paws, her hands were enveloped by his when ever he held her hand. It was the same with the rest of her, Jane was tall, 5 feet 8 inches, but loved standing with bare feet in front of her husband so that she could look up at him when they kissed, or bury her face in his chest when they hugged. They had complete trust and pure love holding them.

When she could not sleep, Jane would go into her children's bedrooms to check on them. Grace's dark curly hair was ever arrayed about her pillow, as though she was waiting for her picture to be taken. She was just like her daddy, dark and beautiful, charming and sweet. Her sister, Lucy was more like Jane, only with her fathers eyes. Lucy liked to keep her hair short because she didn't like having to get it done every morning, she had places to go, things to see. Lucy's short straight blond hair was reminiscent of her mother when she was young, as was her personality. Lucy was a butterfly, dreamy and impulsive. Not much scared little Lucy, but Jane understood her perfectly.

As for the boys, they were everything that anyone could ever expect from a boy. Clayton and Gaius looked and acted as differently as Grace and Lucy. Grace and Clayton seemed as if they could be identical twins rather than fraternal, as was the case with Lucy and Gaius. The older two looked and seemed to take after their father, where their counter parts, almost four years younger were much like Jane. The eight year olds were dark and charming and the four year olds were more other worldly and always busy with some adventure. All of them were the best of friends, rarely was any one left out. They were either a team of four, or two teams of two. They mixed and matched as they saw fit. Grace and Clayton loved helping take care of their younger twin siblings, and Lucy and Gaius looked up to their older twin siblings.

Fighting was allowed, but only verbal fights. Jane had learned a lot about problem solving when she fought with her brother and sister as a child. The only difference was that Jane was able to be there to monitor her children's fights and discussions. Yelling and screaming was allowed to a small extent, but after a few minuted, Jane or Will would step in to tell them to "fight nice." This meant lower your voice, listen to what the other person is saying, wait your turn, and come to a compromise. If they couldn't figure it out on their own, they knew that they could ask for help from mom or dad. If the intent in asking for help was to get the other person in to trouble, both or all parties would be in trouble.

At night the fighting would stop, but then so did the laughing and the giggles. Adventures were placed on pause, stories were set aside, and all was quiet. She could hear them all breathing, slow and steady. Every so often someone would say something inaudible then be silent again. Her sound sleepers rarely responded to her kisses on their foreheads and the whisper of, "I love you." Then Jane would go back to her bed, kiss Will's forehead, and whisper "I love you," to him too. She knew that even if he did respond somehow that he wouldn't remember it anyway. No matter how much Jane loved her babies, her husband was her favorite and that would never change.

Episode Thirteen: MacGregor Chronicles

When the first entered the house my fathers wife tried to explain everything right away, but she would forget herself and begin to speak her native language and nothing was comprehensible to Willard or me. I asked that the two of them be dry, warm, and calm before anything further was said. Now that this was accomplished we all sat down in the fire side room with some tea and talked.

“Where is my father?” I asked starting out.

“He is dead. He died of tuberculosis three nights ago. He knew that it would take him this time, that is why we wanted to see you.”

I was in shock already. The man whom I had had so much trouble forgiving for his psychological abuse throughout childhood was gone and I didn't know what to think or how to feel.

“We wanted to ask you to take Charlotte. I am dying also. I had viral-cardio-miopathy. The doctors gave me six months, but I already almost died giving birth to my little girl.”

“Why us? Why did dad want me to have her?”

“He loves you. He knows that you will teach her about God and that you will love her. He always said that you would be a good mother. Her middle name is Jane, after you.”

“I'm not saying that I don't want her, but where is your family? Don't they want her?” I inquired still not grasping the whole situation.

“ My family is gone, all of them dead. Your father and I, we left Manila just days before my village was burned to the ground by a local militia. We could not fly because of the baby, we had to take a boat to get here.”

“You sailed here, from the Phillipines, dad had TB, you where pregnant and have heart a fatal heart condition.”

“Yes.”

“You do understand that no insurance in the world will cover your hospital bills because what you have is genetic and chronic right.”

“We came here to go to the Mayo clinic, to ask for their help. One of your fathers friends offered to pay the bills in full. I understand that I may not live long enough to have a transplant, but I do want to know that your sister is safe and well.” Janessa explained.

I looked at my baby sister, then at my husband, then at my stepmother. We had no choice, with my father gone and his wife dying, this child had no one to care for her. Even for as angry as I had been with my father, it was not the fault of this sleeping child before me. She was so small and looked a bit ill herself.

“We will take care of her.” Willard answered suddenly. He was not the kind to make snap decisions like this, but he saw the need and the urgency. A smile came across Janessa's pale face. She was only a few years older than myself and looked even younger. I had always wanted to be close to her, but I didn't want anything to do with my father. Now I would be rearing their child, as my own. I hugged her as tears began to stream down both our faces.

Episdoe Six: MacGregor Chronicles

The breakfast nook was made up of an “L” shaped bench around two portions of the table, and three chairs placed at the other open spots. Seating for six comfortably, seven if necessary. The fire side area consisted of a medium sized over stuffed sofa, in a dark khaki, of which the back was turned to the kitchen. An occasional table behind that, a black chair on either side, facing one another, and a smallish glass toped coffee table in the middle. The entire area had hard wood floors, except for a great area rug was under the fire side furniture. The mantel piece held a variety of pictures of Willard and myself, as well as some of our other friends and family, all of whom attended the “Welcome Home,” party. There was a large portrait of Will and me above the smaller pictures, it seemed recent and we looked attractive and happy.

“Weird isn't it?” Will said suddenly.”I remember us planning all of this, buying all of these things, and now it has all come together and it feels so surreal. Like a dream.” I looked at him wide eyed, he knew. It was all an illusion, this was his dream too. Yet then I figured, if this is all a dream, and we're in it together, then why not just go with it until I wake up? It seemed harmless enough. There were things that I would have to figure out and catch up on, but that wouldn't be hard, all I had to do was be myself, do whatever felt natural.

“Yeah, a dream. Even when you can touch things you still expect to wake up at any moment.” I cried.

“I have been going through the house checking things out to see how it all came together, and it is great. The house, the furniture, the decorations, everything is so us. And it's ours, all of it. Feels good doesn't it?”

“Yes, it does. I'm glad to hear you say all of that, I was afraid you might think that I have gone crazy if you caught me snooping around the house, looking at things and such.” I was so relieved.

“No, I've been doing the same thing. Probably more with the electronics and such then perhaps the china, but all the same, it's new and different to me too.” My heart leaped in my chest at the sound of the word china. We had china? Where?

“Well, I have to go get started on this new project for a client. This one will take at least nine or ten months, but it's my first audio book project.” he said. Apparently I looked confused, because then he said, “the latest Barry Eisler book? Remember?” I faked a smile and nodded blankly,

“Yeah, sure.”

“You really do need a break. Take it easy hon. I love you.” he said as he kissed my forehead again, then made his way up the stairs to his studio.

“I love you too.” I answered. From there I made and eat a couple of poached eggs, toast. To this I also added a banana, pineapple juice, and a vanilla yogurt. I found all that I needed easily, like I had set it all up myself. I cleaned up after myself, then proceeded to search my house. The kitchen alone was wonderful, the dishes, the glass ware, the silverware, and the cook ware. I had a huge pantry full of food, the refrigerator was full too. There was a vase of fresh flowers on the dinning room table, I smelled them. When I turned around I saw the china hutch, and the china in it. White bone china bordered in a cream with platinum designs in that. Service dishes, seven piece place settings, including tea cup and saucer, for twelve. There were chargers, place mats, table cloths, runners, cloth napkins, napkin rings, linens for all occasions. I was stunned, these were my things. All I could do was thank God. It might only be a dream, but all good things come from God, and this was a good dream.

Episode Three: Mac Gregor Chronicles

There were a few instances when I was confused still more by the children. I wondered where my children were. I had always wanted children, but none of the fifteen or so children present at the party seemed to belong to me. Yet with all of the other thing going on, I found it difficult to focus on one thing to be baffled by. The entire scene was overpowering for me. Though no matter how confused I was I always had the game face on. I interacted and socialized well with everyone. Every person represented in that big, gray house, with the red front door, seemed to love, admire, and appreciate Will and I that night.

As the night wore on the guests too grew tired and made their way to the the door to leave. I bid them all good night and safe travel. The last of the guests to leave was Willard's father and mother, John and Roxanne. This was the longest fare well of all, they didn't seem to want to leave, but eventually the door closed and Will and I were alone at last. I fell into his arms with exhaustion.

“I love you.” I exclaimed.

“I love you too, are you alright?” was his response.

“Yes, I'm just tired and need to get some sleep.” I answered. I was tired, but more than anything I was trying to sort out the nights events. Dozens of people, caterers, my richly decorated dream house, crazy amounts of knowledge, newer looking vehicles in the drive that apparently belong to us, all of this with no children of our own. What in the world was going on? I was disoriented and filled with bewilderment. I climbed the stair to the second floor to find a bed. When I took a left rather than a right at the top of the stair, Willard inquired,

“I thought you were going to bed, not your study?”

“I am.”

“The bedroom is that way dear.” he said pointing to the right.”Are you sure you're alright?”

“Yes, just an ADD moment and tiredness.” I assured him.

“I will be up in a few minutes, I have to feed Azrael.” An old black and white cat sat at his feet meowing and looking toward a room off to the right on the main floor.

“I love you.” I said again, this time yawning.

“I love you too.” he smiled.

Episode Two: MacGregor Chronicles

My head spun and I had to sit down. There were times when I would say something in other languages, I was suddenly very multilingual. I found myself suddenly fluent in Latin, Greek and Hebrew. This enabled me to have intelligible conversations with a variety of people. I could understand what a man speaking Italian was saying in his own language. Another man spoke Spanish to me, and I understood near perfectly. I seemed to know a lot about anthropology, literature, and chemistry. There were framed poems on the walls in beautiful calligraphy the I had done. At one point in the evening I sat down at a black mini grand piano in the family room and played a few songs, and I sang with people, or played while they sang. I just could not grasp where was all of this coming from?

Many of the guests were my own age, or within ten years thereof. Some I knew, my sister, Kassandra, my brother, Thomas, my mother Bella, and my step-father, John. Now he was old, nearly seventy-five and was apparently mostly blind, but kept expressing how proud he was of me and my beloved husband. He treated my like I was daddy's little girl as he had done since he and my mother had married when I was twelve. My biological father was absent from the party, a long estrangement had seemingly kept him from making the guest list. This knowledge did not bother me at all, it actually made me rather relieved, if not happy. Among the other well wisher were many people whom I felt a deep sense of love for, like we were war buddies or very close comrades at one time or other, and maybe still were to some extent. These were our most intimate friends and beloved family members.

Episode Seventeen: MacGregor Chrinicles

Sunday evening, around six we drove up to our house, much like we had done so many months ago when we were very first arriving at our new home. Now it would really be home, children and all. Not so many cars were parked in the lot this time, but that would have been overwhelming. Will grabbed a car seat in either hand, I took brought the diaper bag. Roxanne opened the door for us and the house smelled of chicken, squash, and green beans. I melted, hospital food is not that great, but home cooked food is divine. Apparently my mother and Will's mother had been cooking and cleaning for a while. Callie was there and already had herself set up in the guest suit, across from the nursery. Also present were our friends Carissa and Wyatt, Molly and Derek, and Will's cousin, Elton, and his wife, Rebekkah.

The car seats were promptly deposited onto the coffee table in the fireside area of the kitchen, greetings and congratulations were issued, and the eating and ogling began. I was very glad to be home among my own things, at least this time arriving home really felt like home, not a strange dream. When I finished eating, I took each of the girls, one at a time, to feed them too. For this I took them to their bedroom, for privacy. Thankfully both of them liked to eat as much as their father and I do, so breast feeding was a snap after the first twelve hours. I did pump too, so Will could take his turn feeding them, something he didn't want to miss out on. The whole cloth diaper scene was another story, Will wanted nothing to do with cloth diapers. So for now, they were in disposables, for the first couple of nights.

Episode Sixteen: MacGregor Chronicles

We arrived at the right hospital with a state trouper escort, in record time. Not doctor recommended, though I was in the back seat. Will pulled me out of his car, I waddled to the door, denying many persistent offers of a wheel chair by my darling husband, and waddled to the admitting desk to sign my name to a previously filled out form. I wanted to talk, let gravity do some of the work for me. I didn't plan on laying on my back for this any way, we had discussed this. To this point I was the logical one and Will was neurotic. I can say though that once the contractions kicked in, I was the neurotic on, and Will calmed down quickly. I was in pain and I became goofy, every last one of my ADHD symptoms hit me full force and I was wild. I was cracking jokes left and right to get myself through the pain. I refused drugs, I had made that choice long ago and was sticking to it. I did feel sorry for some of the staff though, they had a tough time doing their jobs through the laughter. I must have seemed positively maniacal at times.

Only eight hours after my water broke we had two perfect pink princesses to ogle at through the glass. One was stark bald, the other with a full head of black hair. Both with their daddy's big blue eyes, and my slightly turned up nose. I took a nap when they were brought to the nursery. Will waited until eight o'clock that morning to call anyone with the news. His mom was practically on her way by the end of the phone call. For most everyone else he sent out a general text message letting our friends know that the girls were here. I called my mom and John, they agreed to stop by to see the babies later that afternoon. Johns concern was to let me rest, and he was ecstatic to be a granddaddy again.

I had made it quite clear that I did not want to be seen until we were all home, but was happy to let anyone who wanted to come see our new arrivals at their leisure in the hospital nursery. The girls were kept in the nursery unless they were hungry, at which time they were brought to me to breast feed. I got all of the sleep that I could those first thirty six hour. I only saw my beloved husband and my doctors during that time, but Will told me of the other visitors, for our babies. Many friends and family members came to look at the proof that God does indeed have a sense of humor. The girls were tiny and cute, but their visitors laughed at the fact that Will and I finally had children. This they found wildly amazing.

Our daughters, Grace Abigail and Luciana Elizabeth were born Saturday, May 18, 2013, at five thirty in the morning. They were born 95 years to the day after my maternal grandfather, Howard, and his twin brother, Harold. Gracie an Lucy were not identical as were their great grandfather and his twin, but it did seem like providence. I found that holding one of these little products of Will and my love was both terrifying and exhilarating at the same time. I was so thankful for them and I loved my darling husband all the more. I thanked him so many times for them that he asked me to stop. I thanked God more than I thanked Will too. Oh, the things that we had endured to get to this place. Now they were ours, our own.

From Jaime to Jane

I was 14 when I was diagnosed as ADHD, at which time I was put on medication. While I was on my meds I was quiet, subdues, even meek. Off my medication, I was wild, more hyper than before I began taking Ritalin. I was all over the place and felt uncontrolable, though I still held myself to my own set of morals and values. At eighteen, a friend in college talked me into dropping the medication and work on things consciously. I did and I have. There are still behavoirs that have not been overcome but they are no worse than any other person.
A couple of years ago I discovered a way to treat the ADHD with diet and a suppliment regiman. I took on the diet and both my husband and I have noticed a great change. Even my manager at work can tell if I have eaten something I should not have. Different foods bring out different symthems. With ADHD its like having an allergie to certain foods, except rather than a rash or watery eyes, my brain freaks out an causes certain behaviors.
I still have not started the suppliment regiman, we cannot afford it yet, but I would like to try it eventually. I hope that my discovories for myself now will help Mitch and I to handle any children we may have who could be ADD/ADHD.
I still have to master certain things and watch my diet, which by the way has also helped me to lose some weight, but on the whole I ame so much better than I was.
I still talk a lot when I am nervious or anxious and there are times when I have to make a consious effort to relax. I have learned to be me, though I spent most of my life pretending to be someone else or wanting to be a movie or book character. I did not need a self help book to make me who I am, I just needed to find out who I was to begin with. Now I know who I am and who I want to be. I know my flaws and my imperfections and I work on them consciously, day by day, one by one. In the process I usually learn something else about myself or change in a way that I did not expect. I discover things that are so new and strange to me, but many others may have known all along, though I did not understand.
I love to change and grow, learn and be a better me.
For so long I was set on being some one esle, then I wanted to be a more accomplished me. I set out to learn a bunch of things, languages, arts, sports, anything to make me seem more well rounded and knowledgeable. It wan not until nore recently that I came to discover the important difference between being accomplished and having good character. "A woman of character, who can find..." Nothing matters to me more than my character. Learning to be Jane I guess you could say. The woman in my stories is the future me, the person I want to be. She is my ideal self, though still flawed in her own ways. From Jaime to Jane.

Episode One: MacGregor Chronicles or I'm not Jane "yet"

Jane was known as the funny one. She was clever, bright, and willful. Never having been the kind to take "no" for an answer, she chased after her dreams like a child to a butterfly. Over the years she had learned to be patient and to accept what was before her because she knew that the best was yet to come. Nothing and no one could convince her otherwise. She wrote stories, dreamed, talked and sang to herself, and those around her regarded her with high esteem, though they thought she was crazy. Jane firmly believed that anything was possible. Movies and books were not stories, but realities that happened to real people like herself. Her existence was that of a fairy tale, living and breathing. To her life was an adventure, a slow miracle. Those she worked with and many acquaintances seemed to address Jane as a superior, as one who has a greater authority or wisdom than themselves. But her intimate friends, those who knew her the best, called her Jaynus. Her strength of will, drive to learn, and fervent need to have a flawless character carried her through many trials and life lessons. She was not perfect and did not understand peoples regard for her. She saw herself as a silly girl chasing butterflies and rainbows that no one else could see.
Jane knew herself well, acknowledged her faults, and polished her talents. She set high standards for herself and often became frustrated when others did not show the same work ethic. Daily she fought the idea of being typical or like everyone else. Never wanting to be "that wife" or "that person".She and her husband, Will, loved one another implicitly, and respected one another beyond the understanding of some. They discussed everything and confided everything to each other. They complimented and doted on one another constantly. Hugs, kisses, and "I love you"s were as common as eating and drinking at a dinner party. They enjoyed shopping and cooking together.
Jane's love of classical literature was not much overshadowed by her pure desire to learn everything. She valued truth and individual purpose more than anything, character was crucial. She was generous with her finances and willingness to help others. Every person Jane met was treated with respect and in a friendly manner. All she wanted to do was to serve God and her husband.
Mrs. MacGregor was the kind of person everyone wanted to be around or be like. Her smile lit rooms, her conversation brought life and self actuation, and her humor could cause even the most staunch person to at least crack a smile.
The only thing feared by this woman was the loss of her beloved husband or being out of Gods will for her life. Will and Jane were soul mates and couldn't imagine life without each other.
Her employers and many of her co-workers disliked letting her go, whenever she moved, and sometimes didn't like even letting her go on vacation. If she moved they joked that she was to commute from where ever she was going.
Jane loved everyone, and everyone loved Jane. She was crazy and quiet, outspoken and reserved, unpredictable and absolutely reliable. She knew herself and knew how to handle her various quirks and moods. She wrote herself reminder notes for everything and made lists to cope with stress, read books to escape reality, and threw herself into her husbands arms for everything. In all things she prayed.
One of her motto's in life was, "I'll try anything once, within moral and ethical reasoning." Another was, "Everything is a choice, and it's all in your attitude."

Episode Zero: MacGregor Chronicles

Full Character list:

Willard John MacGregor

Jane Winnifred MacGregor

-Grace Abigail

-Luciana Sophia

-Clayton Willard

-Gaius John

John & Bella Marshall

-Kassandra & Henry Austin

-McKenzie

-Thomas & Yuki Grant

-Kimmy

John & Roxanne MacGregor

-Trevor & Tammy Carson

-Savannah

John & Marcie Templeton

-Ashley

Carissa & Wyatt Isaacs

-Jacob

Clara & Marcus Bayer

-Gavin

-Natasha

Liam & Jennifer Bradley

-Sabrina

Brett & Jennifer Griffin

-Michael

Amber & John Graves

-Alana

-Jack

Brady & Jackie Gibbons

-Aaron

-Melissa

Peter & Karena Arnez

Paul & Marisol Saprano

-Amelia

John & Janessa Grant

Derek & Molly Erikson

Domenic & Larissa Paulson

Tony & Kelsey Michaels

Elton & Rebekkah Vincent

Vincent & Angela Smith

Callie Walker

Rebekkah La Port

Marisol Gibbons

Grandma Janice

Episode Fifteen: MacGregor Chronicles

I would have to wait for January to know what sex the babies were, but none the less we were thrilled. Will began to strut, as if to say, “Hey, not only is she pregnant, but there's two of them and I did it.” I laughed and glowed. With the knowledge that multiples average on three weeks early, I was planning to have the nursery ready by the end of April. Cloth diapers were ordered off the Internet, as well as other items to which baby gender didn't matter.

I waited until my own birthday to have the gender discovering ultrasound done. I figured it was only fair that if Will could find out on his birthday that I am pregnant, then I would find out what sex they were on my birthday.

“Well. What do we have here?” the doctor sang.”You have a girl, and a...” he paused. I was plastered to the screen with my husband. “...girl. Two girls.” he announced at last.

“Good job hon.” Will said kissing my forehead.

“Well, really you decided that one.” the doctor reminded him.

“Good job hon.” I laughed, turning the long standing joke back at my beloved.”Hey, one for me, one for you.” I giggled.”Well I hope I get one.”

“They're ours dear, I'll share my girls with you.” he assured me.

“Well I hope so, I'm the one doing all the hauling here.” I laughed. “I just want to know that it won't be the only nine months I get with them.”

It was at this point that will decided that it would be safer that I not drive or sit in the front seat of a vehicle at all. This had been suggested at a class that we were taking and Will took it very seriously. He almost drove me nuts with his concerns until I gave him an expectant fathers book to read. He had it read in a week, his best time to date. After that he relaxed a bit. We continued to buy things for the nursery and Will started looking at baby clothes more than I. Outfits were bought, everything in two's just different colors. I could swear our children would be well dressed for the first three years of their lives before I stopped him. I had to remind him that other people would be buying us things for showers too.

I had three baby showers, one from my side of the family, one from his, and one from our friends. Three showers, three times we filled our vehicles with gifts. We did end up with duplicates, some of which we took back, others we held onto. We decided to leave some of the duplicate items at the grandparents homes for use there, whenever we would visit. My mom, Bella, and step-dad, John, would see the girls more often throughout the year, so more items were left at their house in Coon Rapids, than were left at Roxanne and John's, Will's parents, in Wisconsin. My friend, Callie, volunteered to take care of Will and me, the house, and the meals for the first few weeks after the girls were born. It would be wonderful having someone take care of us so we could take care of our children.

Everything was set and settled by tax day. Six more weeks and we would have the whole dream. By now though I was ready to be done being pregnant. I enjoyed it, but I was anxious to have them out and care for them on the outside world. I felt large and rolly-polly. On May 17, Will decided to take me out, to celebrate our family. Oddly one of the foods that I craved was from a Palestinian restaurant in Minneapolis. We went to the “Holy Land,” I eat, drank green tea, and was merry. We were on our way to a theater when my water broke, at eight thirty at night, far from home, and our hospital. Our hospital was an hour and a half away. Will didn't want to drive it, he figured we could go to a closer hospital. I called my OBGyn, he said to drive it. I wasn't in a great deal of pain with contractions or anything, so we had time.

Episode Nineteen: Mac Gregor Chronicles

It had been four years since Charlotte,(or Charlie if you like) had come to live with Willard and I, we adopted her not long after my stepmother died and things seemed to be running at a good rhythm for us. Everyday I took Charlie to her school in St. Cloud, she was socialized with other Deaf children and I had time to do house work and a few errands while she was gone. She was a brave little girl, though quiet and reserved, she stood up for what she knew was right. Her facial expressions were fantastic, which helped a lot when it came to her signing and communication. She was a bright child who picked up on things rather quickly. She could read people, especially Will and I within seconds. She knew who to stay away from and who was okay to approach, even if they were strangers. If something was wrong, either Will or I became upset, no matter how much we tried to play normal, she knew.

One warm spring day, just after school had gone into break, Charlie and I were sitting out on the front deck of our home, in New London, when a call from the front gate came in. There was a small group of men asking admittance, they were here to do the lawn work that Willard didn't have time to do because of his current project. I pushed the button to let them in and soon a mid-sized green truck rolled up to the house. Three men vacated the cab, I looked at each of them carefully, or tried to without staring. One was younger, tall and thin, like the classic “pool boy.” I thought to myself that he was in the wrong line of work, and smiled a bit. The second seemed to be in his fifties, with a small gut, and not very attractive at all. The last man looked to be in his late thirties early forties, head shaved bald, with a light blue handkerchief tied around his neck. Classic. The man was the first to come up to introduce himself as Pete from the lawn company I had called a week ago. He pointed to the youngest of the three and introduced him as Derrik, then to the bald man, Joshua. I shook Pete's hand, then Derrik's. Joshua was a bit stand offish at first and I couldn't get a good look at his face. Pete politely ordered Joshua to come up for “inspection by the lady,” as he put it. When Joshua finally climbed the six steps to the platform of the porch, I understood his hesitation, and I myself was in a bit of shock. I managed to play it cool as I said hello and introduced these new people to my daughter.

I signed to her as I said their names and gave them each name signs that she would remember. She giggled when I made curls in my hair with a “P” sign for Pete. She giggled again when I gave her the sign for “cute” with the letter “D”, for Derrik. But when I got to Joshua she didn't giggle, she was confused. For him I signed donkey with a “J.” Apparently Derrik understood all of it and laughed, especially at Joshua. I explained everything to them concerning the signs I gave them, but I lied when I told them what was meant for the bald man. In doing this I received what Willard and I referred to as the two o'clock look from Derrik, and a tap on the leg from Charlotte. She could read lips and she knew that I had lied. I told her that I would explain later, then continued to give the men a list of the duties that I needed them to do today, and my expectations for the rest of the spring through fall. I signed everything that I said, so Charlie could understand, it's rude to talk to hearing people in the company of a Deaf person without including them in what is said, even children.

When them men had gone about their business I asked my little girl to join me in the house. I had to explain myself. I told her that Joshua was someone I knew from a long time ago, and hurt my feelings, but had never had the chance to apologize. What I didn't tell her was that I had worked with him on a project, but on a different team, and he had flirted with me unabashedly, for months. I was flattered of course, but nothing ever came of it. He was fired from that job, and soon there after the project we had been working on was finished.

She told me that she didn't like the was he Joshua looked at me, that she didn't trust him. I assured her that everything would be fine and that we had to be nice to all of the people who worked for us. At that time she began to tell me that she liked the man who plowed our driveway in the winter, Taylor. She would invite him in for coffee or hot chocolate, if we were his last stop for the day, and we usually were.

At four o'clock, Charlotte decided it was a good time for the men to take an ice tea break. We made fresh home made ice tea and she went out to gather the troops. I had nothing to worry about, the entire five acres were fenced in and though she was Deaf, my child could scream and make noise louder than any hearing child ever could, if she was in trouble. She ran off down th steps, finding Joshua first. She took a note with her to communicate, before she left I wrote, “Ice tea break, front porch.” Joshua was the first of the crew whom she found. She showed him the note and he shook his head, “no.” With her big brown eyes she persuaded him. Still he denied her. She leaned against a tree and stared at him for a few moments, studied him. Then she pulled out one big crocodile tear. He caved and headed for the house. She waited until he was out of sight, then skipped off to find the next man.

Episode Fourteen: MacGregor Chronicles

Over the course of the next few weeks a great many things took place. We buried my father, adopted my sister, went to countless trips to the doctors in Rochester, and agreed when the time came to allow Janessa to stay with her daughter at our house during her last days.

Janessa died July 9, 2013, we buried her next to my father in the Grant family plot in St. Paul, Minnesota. She died on my fathers birthday. I cried more then than I had at my fathers funeral. I had finally become close to my stepmother, now she was gone. Charlotte was almost three months old when her mother died.

Endless ear infections plagued the poor child and in spite of the doctors efforts she eventually lost her hearing completely. Our gift from God was deaf for life at four months old. I had intended to teach all of my children sign language when I had them. I just never expected it to be anything more than a bit of education and fun, this was necessity.

Charlotte grew, healthy and beautiful. She had my fathers blue eyes and smile, and her mothers dark skin and black hair. She was a quiet baby, but caught on to the signing very quickly. At first I was not sure if I should teach my little girl to address me as sister or mommy. Legally she was my daughter, but she was also my fathers daughter from his second marriage. Will assured me that the right thing to do was for us to act as mommy and daddy, then when she was old enough to understand we would explain everything to her. This seemed like a wise choice, so I began to teach the child that I was Mama and Will was Daddy.

Will was delighted to have a little girl. He had always wanted daughters to love and protect, now he had a sparkle eyed little tot to see him as a knight in shining armor. We had completely forgotten about having our own children, for a while, and we enjoyed being just the three of us. Having a deaf child was a bit of a challenge at times, we learned a lot from her. You cannot yell at a deaf child, and when they don't want to listen, all they have to do is close their eyes.

About a month after Janessa died we threw a welcome to the family/adoption party. We invited all of our families and intimate friends to celebrate the life of the child by which God had blessed us. Every guest raved about how beautiful she was and how God had done an amazing work. A prophet friend of ours told us that God would do great things through her and that she was special. Many gifts were received for both parents and child, clothes mostly, and some toys. Our friends and family were surprised to find that even with the hearing trouble she had Charlotte loved the piano. I would put her in her bouncy seat atop the piano then play. The could feel the vibrations of the notes as I hit them and she would smile and laugh. Some songs would even lull her to sleep.

Toward the middle of August we attended the State Fair. This was our first chance to have a baby in the baby parade for Super Talk Saturday. Charlotte Jane may not be a spectacular name, but she was a beautiful child to show off and she had as good a chance of winning a prize as any. She was four months old that day, and we did end up winning the prize for best name. The hosts thought the story that she was my sister was interesting. A news paper got wind of it and we ended up interviewing for a story about the whole thing for the paper. Not front page, but intriguing any way.

It was not until then that we realized that she may have to go to a special school for a while to learn some things. I was planning to home school our children, but I hadn't a clue as to how to socialize and educate a Deaf child. She would have to be introduced into the Deaf community.

Episode Twelve: MacGregor Chronicles

“Oh, hon.” he kissed my forehead and hugged me tighter.

“That's what we've been doing all of this for isn't it? Working all this time, paying off our debt, building our house. We've done everything we set out to do. So why don't we have any children?”

“Well, do you want to go to the doctor to see if he can tell us what our options are?” Will suggested. I nodded. We hadn't done anything to prevent my getting pregnant for almost thirteen years now and I had not become so. For a long time I feared that we would not be able to have children of our own. We had even discussed the adoption option, but for the past six years we had put the whole scheme out of our heads until we could afford a child either way.

The following week we went to our regular doctor to be checked out and to get a plan down for conception. We decided that if we could not conceive on our own within six months, then we would go to fertility medications. On the fourth month on our own, I found myself with child. We were thrilled and scared. We knew the likelihood of miscarriages for women over thirty and took this very seriously.

Unfortunately, in spite of our carefulness, I lost the baby after ten weeks. I was very sad for a long time, but I did not allow depression to set in. During my sadness something very unexpected occurred.

I received an email, from my father. He was in the states again and wanted to see me. He and his wife, my step-mother, Janessa had moved back to the Philippines to be closer to her family five years earlier. Now they were back and my father seemed desperate to see me.

I could not help but agree to see him, the wording of his email was something I could not ignore. I replied with my consent to meet him at a small dinner in town the next week. I would never invited him to my home and refused to go to his own living area. A couple of days after the agreement to meet there was a buzz from our gate late at night. We weren't expecting anyone. It was pouring rain out and we had decided to stay in for the night to enjoy the storm. When I answered a weak voice with a still fairly strong Asian accent responded. It was my Janessa, someone from town had dropped her off and she was standing there in the rain. Willard immediately want to get her in his car.

How had she gotten here? Why was she alone? It had to be important. When the Willard returned with Janessa it was plain to see the urgency. In her arms was a tiny baby girl, she looked to be maybe a few weeks old. Both my stepmother and my new baby sister were soaked. The baby, Charlotte, was crying and chilled. We did everything we could to dry and warm them both. I took Charlotte while her mother took a warm shower. The soaked clothes of each went into the washer, then the dryer. I borrowed Janessa some warm pajamas and socks to wear, though they were a bit big on her because of the height difference. The tiny baby girl I stripped down and wrapped a soft cotton blanket around her. Thankfully my stepmother had diapers in a diaper bag that was with her. By the time Janessa was warm and dry, her daughter was as well. Charlotte was sleeping comfortably in a large woven basket lined with towels.

When the first entered the house my fathers wife tried to explain everything right away, but she would forget herself and begin to speak her native language and nothing was comprehensible to Willard or me. I asked that the two of them be dry, warm, and calm before anything further was said. Now that this was accomplished we all sat down in the fire side room with some tea and talked.

“Where is my father?” I asked starting out.

“He is dead. He died of tuberculosis three nights ago. He knew that it would take him this time, that is why we wanted to see you.”

I was in shock already. The man whom I had had so much trouble forgiving for his psychological abuse throughout childhood was gone and I didn't know what to think or how to feel.

“We wanted to ask you to take Charlotte. I am dying also. I had viral-cardio-miopathy. The doctors gave me six months, but I already almost died giving birth to my little girl.”

“Why us? Why did dad want me to have her?”

“He loves you. He knows that you will teach her about God and that you will love her. He always said that you would be a good mother. Her middle name is Jane, after you.”

“I'm not saying that I don't want her, but where is your family? Don't they want her?” I inquired still not grasping the whole situation.

“ My family is gone, all of them dead. Your father and I, we left Manila just days before my village was burned to the ground by a local militia. We could not fly because of the baby, we had to take a boat to get here.”

“You sailed here, from the Phillipines, dad had TB, you where pregnant and have heart a fatal heart condition.”

“Yes.”

“You do understand that no insurance in the world will cover your hospital bills because what you have is genetic and chronic right.”

“We came here to go to the Mayo clinic, to ask for their help. One of your fathers friends offered to pay the bills in full. I understand that I may not live long enough to have a transplant, but I do want to know that your sister is safe and well.” Janessa explained.

I looked at my baby sister, then at my husband, then at my stepmother. We had no choice, with my father gone and his wife dying, this child had no one to care for her. Even for as angry as I had been with my father, it was not the fault of this sleeping child before me. She was so small and looked a bit ill herself.

“We will take care of her.” Willard answered suddenly. He was not the kind to make snap decisions like this, but he saw the need and the urgency. A smile came across Janessa's pale face. She was only a few years older than myself and looked even younger. I had always wanted to be close to her, but I didn't want anything to do with my father. Now I would be rearing their child, as my own. I hugged her as tears began to stream down both our faces.

Episode Twentytwo: MacGregor Chronicles

A civil war broke out not long after the new president was sworn in. State founded militia troops popped up all over th country. Civil and individual rights had been whittled away by frivolous laws for years. The government had it's hand in everyones personal lives. Delegation of morals and ethics it saw fit to rule and reign. The sleeping rebellion was awakened and flared up quickly after long smoldering, in turn it was a long burn.

In this time also, the church arose, retaking it's place in society. It's members took in orphans and widows. They fed the hungry and clothed the naked. The country had divided into various groups took hold, but in the end two factions remained. There were the 'United People' and the 'Governmentals.' All else fled or remained in hiding.

The revolution seemed inevitable to some, after the long war that had been going on for the last decade or so.

The lines between rich and poor were abolished, middle class was now non-existent. Education was also reformed, public school was reserved for the lower tax brackets, yet even so, education was not entirely free to it's attendance. Some rich families, rather than sending their children to the new private schools, chose to hire governesses for their children, others home schooled. Now and then a well established family would undertake to be a benefactor to a lower class child whom showed some potential in a given area. Private school standards were high, rules were more strict, and uniforms required. Some private schools were supported by a given religion, some were not. There were chain schools, like state universities, that were associated with one another, yet were still independent of each other in many ways.

Many previously government run and funded programs were eliminated. Some laws were altered considerably, others rendered extinct. Anything that even seemed like a socialist program was shut down and alternatives were brought back from the past or new ideas were proposed, yet everything was done by the cooperation of the people and voluntarily.

People were expected to think for themselves, and take responsibility for their actions. Frivolous law suites were dismissed out of hand. Only five appeals were allowed by convicted felons who were sentenced for corporal punishment, this now was considered a fair punishment nationally for certain crimes.

Many rich began to sponsor families from foreign country to immigrate to the states. The new residents were given work in lower class positions, usually farmers, servants, and child care providers for the rich.

The government reverted back to it's original state, capitalism reigned over all. Repeat criminals face more server punishments. All peoples still had equal rights, no matter what race, creed, or religion. Taxes were only to support the military, otherwise were funded in other ways or gone. Sales taxes were gone. Roads and construction were paid for by those who chose to use the new toll ways. Public transportation was altered to privately owned companies, fleets of buses and taxi's still made their routes and calls.

Our children attended a private school called the Wesleyan Academy of Classic Education or WACE. It offered everything we could ask. There was a deaf program for Charlotte, this was what brought us to it from the beginning. This school also taught, as it's regular curriculum, Latin, Greek, and Hebrew, etiquette and finishing courses for both boys and girls, and a wide array of extra curricular activities. Class sizes were small, parent involvement was high, and every teacher was well qualified and certified for their position. Preschool through grade twelve was offered, and nothing seemed lacking. I chose to home school our biological daughter through the third grade, but Charlotte began preschool as soon as she was old enough and a spot was opened.

The school mascot was a lion, their colors bright green, gray, red, and yellow. The school store provided everything from books and book bags to wardrobe from head to toe for every occasion the school offered. Everything was of the highest quality, nothing was over looked.

WACE was also a boarding school, it rendered it's boarding services to fifty per cent of it's enrolled students. Because there had not been much time since the reform, not enough private schools had been built to accommodate the number of children who had previously been educated in the public forums. As a result many upper class parents were forced to put their children in a boarding school, even if their children could come home for weekends and holidays. There wee also a number of children hosted by other parents of enrollees, kind of like foreign exchange students. The students parents paid for the tuition, clothing, travel, and spending money, but the host parents covered room and board. Will and I took in the twin sons of some friends of ours, after our own daughters were in junior high school.

Boys and girls wore their respective uniforms. Boys could wear pants or shorts, girls could wear a variety of skirts, jumpers, and skorts, but on Fridays they were allowed to wear pants or shorts if they chose. There was a vast array of cuts and styles for both genders to chose from, though the variety lessened for their physical education uniforms, outer and foot wear. The only distinguishing marks for any attendant to this school was the number of combinations they could come up with for their individual daily outfits from week to week. Some alternated between two or three sets of clothes, others seemed like they never wore the same combination twice in a month.

Our girls owned one of everything, in each color that the school store had to offer in their size, this made larger but less frequent loads of laundry, and shopping was a snap. The girls never wore the same sizes, being five years apart in age, there was no issue with knowing what items belonged to whom.

Episode Eleven: MacGregor Chronicles

In the year 2007, while Will and I were still living in Wisconsin, I read a book entitled “Rich dad, Poor dad,” by Robert Kiyosaki. I was hooked, I had to learn everything there was about investments of every kind. Real estate investing particularly interested me. From mutual funds to vacant lots, to apartment buildings. We began small, then as the money grew, we built our empire. We always kept in mind that no matter what choices we made, God was still the ruler of it all, but He guided us as well. We knew the value of giving back also, not just in funding, but in time and in every other was we could give.

Within a few years, not only were we out of debt and rebuilding our credit, but we had gained several assets and were able to work from home. Will started his radio imaging company just before going back to college for his bachelors degree in radio broadcasting. I handled our banking and investing. I took classes and went to seminars every chance I could find. I found every manner of learning that seemed directly or indirectly related to the subjects that interested me. I was not out to gain a degree or certification, just a new and better way to invest.

Over the course of these few years before we built the house, we re-entered the para-church organization that had gone on hiatus before we had moved to Wisconsin. Our goal was to eventually build a place where the leaders of the organization, and any one else who may need a break from the world, could go. It was a sort of camp, a refuge from the spiritual war that they we fight daily. Anyone could come to stay for a night, a week, how ever long they needed the break. This was not a place for conferences, classes, or pow-wow's, this would be a place for individual counsel and spiritual rehabilitation. A place to seek God, recenter, focus on Him. A place to get away from the noise of opinions and spiritual racket of every day life.

The idea of the Refuge had come to me on our way back to Wisconsin from a cousins wedding in Minnesota the spring of 2006. I saw our house on a large lot of land, with five cabins, and a small stable. Each cabin would only sleep about four people comfortably. Solitude was the aim in all of this. Will and I understood the importance of getting away from everything to find direction. God had separated us from the organization for some years to show us things that we otherwise would not have been able to understand. We knew how vital it was to every leader, and non-leader, to get away for life for a while, to get back to the basics.

When the opportunity came with the right time we found a property just outside a small town. It was a prime location, not far from the Twin Cities, the organization headquarters, and my family. The sleepy little town of Berkshire offered everything we needed, it was perfect. We bought the five acre plot of land, sectioned off an acre for our own house, then donated the rest to the organization. Other donations were made by small committees of outside contributers for the construction of the cabins. Each committee chose from one of five floor plans, and designated the interior design for their specific cabin. Everything from blue prints to furnishings were donated, it was Will and my job to manage the property. We decided what companies to hire for the grounds keeping, maintenance, and housekeeping. We never had to fix a toilet or mow the lawn, we were just middle management. The Refuge was a small part of the non-profit organization, everything was donated, and nothing was ever lacking. Many of the people who came to the Refuge gladly donated how ever much they would pay to stay in a hotel with similar accommodations. We kept track of and the donations, paid for the services and supplies we needed, then sent excess funds to the main office along with a financial report.

Episode Ten: MacGregor Chronicles

Announcing that we were finally to have children was a big event for us. Will's parents had all but lost hope in us, but my parents knew it wouldn't be much longer after we built the house. Will called his parents to tell them the news before we even had our first meeting with my midwife, despite my attempts to dissuade him. We told my parents a week later at a previously arranged dinner at my mother house. My mother expressed herself in her usual way, but I knew that her concern was less than her happiness for us. I reminded her that I would now need twice the bedding that I had asked her to make years earlier. She wondered if I still wanted the Noah's Ark patterns that I requested then or if I would want something different for each of the twins. I told her that I still wanted the Noah's Ark for one, but I would have to get back to her on if I wanted the same for both.

For the first week after we found out, Will would smother me with kisses all over my face, then my stomach. I giggled and laughed and played along. Doctors visits became routine and I grew. When I began to show, Will would slather my stomach with lotion and love on me constantly. He had the pregnancy glow almost as much as I did. He began to strut when we were out together. I shook my head and sighed. My moods would swing all over, but he held me when I cried and forgave me when I was crabby.

Some weeks later, at a doctors visit, we were informed that we were going to have one boy and one girl. From there the shopping commenced. I ordered many items on-line, I requested a few more hand made items of my mother, and the rest we shopped for on Saturdays only. I slept in the family room for a couple of nights while Will painted our front guest bedroom to turn it into a nursery. He had always bee quiet protective of me, and now he was more than ever. Every precaution was taken to the extreme, any warning the midwife brought up was enforced. I was forced to sit in the back seat of the car, not allowed to drive anywhere. He almost forbade me, at one point, to leave the main floor of the house. I consented for a while, knowing that eventually he would come to his senses, he lasted almost a week before he was too lonely in bed one night. I was waited on hand and foot, sometimes I took advantage, other times I argued. I warned him that he was going to ware himself out, then when the babies were here he wouldn't have enough energy to help. As the weeks wore, he slackened on some things because of my irritation, but with others he stood firm.

I was glad to be pregnant during the fall and winter. I was due on our anniversary, but was assured that I would probably be two or three weeks earlier. The nursery was finished by the first part of April. I was thrown two baby showers in Minnesota, one by my family, the other by our friends. My mother-in-law planned another shower for us at the end of June. Will's side didn't believe in baby showers until after the baby was born. We arranged for our friend, Carissa, to come help us for a while after our son and daughter were born. My first choice had been my mother, but she wouldn't be done with school yet. Carissa would leave her husband, Wyatt, and their ten year old son, Jake, at home, but they would come visit often. She would help mostly with house cleaning and food preparation.

In the back of my mind May 18 was the date I wanted to have my twins. It was my the date my grandfather and his twin had been born almost one hundred years earlier, it seemed right. On that very morning, I woke at five o'clock thinking I had to use the bathroom. I waddled, as all very pregnant women do, to the bathroom, groggy and blurry eyed, then a strange sensation. I was a rare, yet rather comical explosion.

“Hon. Willard.” I called. A grunt came from the far side of the bed. “Will, your children want out.” another grunt. I grabbed a towel to clean myself up a bit, remained calm, contained the mess, and got dressed. I waddled over to my beloved sleeper, shoved his shoulder over and announced that we had to go.

“What?” He was never very quick to wake.

“Your children want to escape.” I said in a firm, less calm tone.

“Children? Babies!”

I called my midwife before Will was even completely awake and she arrived no less than twenty minutes later. I was glad we had chosen to have our babies at home where I was comfortable and knew that I had all the time in the world to do things in the way I felt was best. 

Grace Abigail, our daughter, was 16 inches, 5 pounds 8ounces. Her brother Clayton Willard, was 17 inches 6 pounds 2 ounces. Both with daddies big blue eyes and thick dark eyelashes. Grace had a thick mat of dark brown hair, Clayton was bald like I had been. I was able to put a little pony tail in Graces hair before we even left the hospital. Clayton had a tiny blue and orange baseball cap that my mother had brought with her to see her new grand-babies. The appropriate calls were made a few hours after I had delivered, various people assured visits and others, like Will's parents, let us know that they were on their way.

I was so thankful, especially in those first weeks for the few books that I had read about training babies. They both, rather quickly and easily, latched onto the routine we had set up for them. Within a couple of days they were sleeping through the night and knew when it we time for what, be it feeding or sleeping. Grace was more laid back like Will. Clayton was more quirky and high strung, like me. Wills voice was everything to them. Whenever he spoke, both of the babies listened. I was glad to find that both of our children loved to snuggle. One day the four of us were sitting in the fireside room. Will with Grace and I with Clayton. All four of us had fallen asleep, both Will and I had a baby on our chest. Carissa took a picture, we used it for our Christmas greeting that year.

Episode Nine: MacGregor Chronicles

After investigating the pavilion for a bit, I walked the path to the deck, then entered the house by the back door. Will was sitting in the kitchen on a bar stool eating a sandwich when I entered.

“Hey Mister.” I greeted him.

“Hi hon.” He responded.

“This might seem silly to ask, but have you seen all of that out there?” I inquired still amazed by everything.

“I have a question.” He stated.

“Yes.”

“Are you going to be like this when we build our vacation house next year?” He asked. I stared blankly, like a deer in headlights. “I will take that as a yes, and I think you need to see a doctor.”

“I think I need a nap or something.” I agreed.

“Or something.” He repeated.

“Hey, meanie. Why don't you have trouble wrapping your brain around all of this?” I sassed.

“Because we've been planning all of this for years. Why should I be so surprised that our plans succeeded?”

“Well, I guess.”

“This has been our dream, what we have worked for for so long. The only thing we don't have now is children.”

“Yeah, why is that?” I asked.

“Because we have been working to attain all of this. So we can be home, you can take care of them and we could be financially independent.”

“But you still work.”

“I work because I love what I do. The financial aspect of it is secondary. We invest what I make and that is how we live. You write and invest, I have my recording studio.”

During this conversation I began to make myself some lunch. In spite of my choices, I decided on something simple. I had shells and cheese, spinach, chicken nuggets, and pears. This was a meal I had apparently become accustomed to in our poorer years. The only difference now was that I was able to use fresh ingredients and make everything from scratch, rather from a can or box.

“So you're saying that we have everything in order and that all we have to do now is have children?” I replied as I placed a handful of fresh spinach into a steamer.

“Yes, I guess you could say that.”

“So, what are we waiting for?” I smiled.

"Well I would suggest that you get some of those supplements you have gotten in the past and let's go ahead and try." he consented. 
Not a three months later I found myself pregnant, with twins. My midwife was a fantastic woman of great experience and wisdom. She suggested a doctor she knew for when we wanted to find out the gender of the babies; at that point though we were just happy and didn't care about gender yet. Ultimately I did want to know gender before they were born because I didn't like the idea of either girls or boys spending their first three to six months of life in gender neutral clothes. No matter what the rest of the world said, we wanted our daughters to be girls and our sons to be boys, in the trues sense of the terms.

I was thankful that because my eating habits were already good that I didn't have to change anything. I was warned about my usual exercise routine and to was eventually restricted to certain activities. Being in my thirties and carrying twins brought greater likelihood of being put on bed rest later in the pregnancy.

Episode Seven: MacGregor Chronicles

So many things had passed that I found it difficult to keep up. Every now and again I would have a flash back, that would help me to remember how I came to my present place in life. Slowly the gaps filled. Strangely though, none of the memories were negative. There had to be some things that had happened in the last sixteen years that were not so great. I knew myself too well enough to know that I don't learn the easy way. Tribulation is what eventually makes a marriage strong or tears it apart, we were impenetrable even. All of the hard times had paid off, but where were they in my memory. I dismissed this at last, believing that eventually all of my memory would fill in and I would be whole again. There were so many private jokes between us, numerous games we played in our affection. There were understandings and so many things that didn't need to be spoken, just because we knew one another that well.

I spent the greater part of Monday morning exploring our yard, all five acres of it. Much of the area was wooded and I discovered that there were eight other buildings on the lot. Among the eight were five well kept cabins, a stable, a chapel, and an other garage. There were cobbled roads and trails everywhere through out the estate, with a nine foot cast iron fence about the perimeter. The main gate where we had entered the night before had two great stone pillars on either side of the drive, and a large metal “M” for MacGregor in the middle. There was an intercom for visitors and a key pad for us on the other side for opening the gates upon arrival. Once on the other side of the gate you had the choice of heading straight to the main house or you could go either right or left. Turning to the left would bring you past three cabins, evenly spaced apart, with parking and foot paths between them. Each cabin was different, but all were of about the same size. Turning to the right would take you to two more cabins, then a small stable with a shed on the back. Between the cabins on the right and those on the left was a wooded space about as big as two football fields, with a couple of foot paths dividing each of them and a driving path between the two sections. Everything looked well planned and neatly kept. The three roads all came together on a lane before the main house, and a ten port parking area was at the back of the main carport. Two octagons, one just the inside of the main gate and the other directly before the main house were connected by the center drive.

Beyond the extra parking area was a hill with a small chapel at the summit. The back yard of the main house was a flat grassy yard, wide and long. From the top of the hill I could see the whole yard, a lot of trees, and my house. On the back of the house was a sizable deck with an above ground pool at one end. The pool was set exactly outside our kitchen window. Also on the deck was a large table with comfortable looking chairs and an umbrella. A red stone path from the bottom of the stair down from the deck, ended at a twenty by twenty foot pavilion. The floor of the pavilion was of the same red stone as the path from the deck. The structure was of sturdy metal with an attractive olive colored cloth covering the top and sides. The wall cloth could be pulled back and tied like curtains, or pulled together by hidden zippers to completely enclose the square. In the middle of the pavilion was a footed fire pit, with table edges around it. There were also tables and chairs, a small wet bar in one corner, and a couple of chase lounges. It was not crowded, but comfortable and relaxing.

Episode Twenty three: MacGregor Chronicles

I finished the first book of my own writings, then looked at the clock to find that it was going on four thirty in the afternoon. Small wonder that I was so hungry, I had missed lunch all together and it was almost dinner time. I entered the kitchen moments later only to see my darling husband already working on dinner.

“There you are,” he greeted me, “come here I need a hug.” He wrapped his arms around me and squeezed, I responded likewise.

“What are you making?” I asked.

“The same thing we've always made as our first meal in a new place, spaghetti and meatballs, and French bread with cheese.”

“That's right, we couldn't have it last night because of the party so now we're here.”

“Sounds like you have everything in order again.” he responded.

I smiled and nodded, “I'm getting there. Thankfully I have you to keep me sane in the weird transitions of life.”

“That's my girl.” Willard said, kissing my forehead.

“You know what?” I asked.

“You love me?” he answered.

“You know this game?” I laughed, “You know what else?”

“I'm cute.” he laughed back.

“You do know this game!” Yet another joke or game between us that I had to rediscover and it was fun. I looked at me as a man who was completely head over feet in love. I smiled, then almost cried.

“Oh no, what's wrong hon?” he asked as he put his arms around me again.

“Everything is just so perfect. The house, our life, you. I couldn't possibly be happier or ask for more.” I cried. He laughed and gave me an extra little squeeze before letting me go. He had to attend to the pasta water at this point, and I had to wipe my eyes.

“Hey,I got a bottle of your favorite wine to go with dinner.”

“You did? You really are the best.” I smiled, then kissed his lips.

“I have everything under control here. Do you want to set the table?” he suggested.

“Sure. What do you say to christening the China?” I inquired.

“I wouldn't have it any other way.”

“Better and better.”

Dinner tasted great and the conversation was wonderful. He told me about his newest project and I let him in on my having spent the day reading my old journals. We laughed and everything seemed very normal. It was as though we had always been this way, and we had lived in this house forever. This was the start of many new things for us, the opening of another chapter to our lives. It seemed strange though that for the first time we were celebrating our final move and the anniversary of the first day we met on the same day. For dessert we had chocolate chip mint ice cream, as was our tradition for the day we met. This had been my choice of treat at the social where we were introduced.

As we cleaned up the kitchen after dinner and dessert, we had yet another one of our famous conversations that helped to build our marriage into the fortress that it had become. To add to all of this Will turned on some Frank Sinatra for them to dance to when they finished up. Over the years it had been Willard's thing to sing along with old blue eyes for my entertainment. When I was down or for the sake of celebrating our good fortune, Will and Frank would sing for me.